we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
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