thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Randomize
