i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
When you're opening a bottle of tequila with a golf club, it's probably time to stop drinking...
apparently i was just sitting there with my shirt down holding my boobs saying "its ok. its all gonna be ok"
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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