so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
I wanna borrow his axe at this point and cut my head open just to relieve some pressure
THAT BEAUTIFUL FACE AND HEAVENLY LIGHTING IS NOT HELPING THE NOT DEAD POINT HOW DO I NOT KNOW YOU ARE NOT TEXTING ME FROM THE AFTERLIFE
The after life smells like latex gloves and hand soap
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
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