TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
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