omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
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long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
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