Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
You are a booty call, not a friend.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
He was stoned and starts screaming, "I ain't got but a dollar, I wanna hear waterfalls!". Maybe he can hang with us....
we fucked in the backseat of my car at the observatory, right under the stars. it was a starry, orgasmic filled night
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
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