Dual....:-)
I woke up this morning with "guy in polar bear j.crew boxers" written on my stomach along with a 5 digit phone number...
Just took career test that listed librarian and bartender as top career choices. Fascinating.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
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