Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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