Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Apparently we were arguing for captain seats so I shouted "who has your virginity." I got the seat.
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize