So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
You took a bar mat shot.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
Our DD has become famous. Strippers are asking to be handcuffed to him.
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I woke up in a limo in long Island, Ny this morning. Talk about a black out
Who put my cat in the fridge?
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
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