Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize
