I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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