i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Randomize
