Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
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