I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
