so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
Randomize
