I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize
