ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
