Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
My feet surprised me
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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