'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
the jail released me with 39 mardi gras beads. I need details.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Used my phone to vibrate 'eye of the tiger'. It's like Rocky is punching my nuts, but gently.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Realized we were outta oj used gerber graduates mixed fruit juice as a mixer. Mother of the Year award right here
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
