Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
second attempt at shower sex: failed after the water turned orange bc of a fire up the street. this is just not meant to be
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
Randomize
