I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
thought a girl was checking me out today. took me like 5 minutes to realize it was a mannequin
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
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