the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
