around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I wish there was a hungover fairy to brush my teeth and bring me a diet coke.
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize