yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
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