Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
So I lost my dignity between the strip club and your penis...
Randomize
