I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
It's like playing clue with my own life. I have to piece together what I did, where I was, how I did it, and who I did it to
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
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