I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
the day after is always just damage control
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
And then he serenaded me with "Pimps don't cry" from 'The Other Guys'. If that's not love I'm not sure what is
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
I brought coffee but not enough for the naked guy on your porch
Randomize
