Strip flip cup NEVER equals good idea
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Sangria Sundays can't keep happening. Even my second grade students know I'm hungover. Benji even gave me his oreos its that bad
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Randomize
