I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
I can text with my tongue
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Just in case you forgot, last night you came home drunk and pissed all over my laptop. You owe me a laptop.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize
