tell your sister to shave her snatch
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
