My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
Dude, you really need to stop hitting on girls by telling them you sang a cappella in college.
I was born with a shot glass in my hand
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
operation harelip BJ is a go
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
she pinky promised me she was 18
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
Randomize
