i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
So I decided to put different foods on my dick to see which would feel the best
and??
Cake is only good when you eat it
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
I don’t have the time, patience, or blood alcohol level to deal with her.
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
