we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
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