She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Everclear isn't food dammit
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
is it fun? or sober?
Randomize
