somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
I woke up this morning with I hate myself feeling
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
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