Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
My grandma had to be escorted out by police.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
