You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
