I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
My biology professor just used the phrase "dick fairy" in a sentence. No, it didn't make more sense in context.
Its piss that you smell... I borrowed that shirt last week. Sooo, wanna grab some laundry soap on your way home? And good luck on your date.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Based off of the soaking wet clothes/towels/rugs, Eiffel Tower statue and monkey in the bathtub, I'm going to assume drunk me took a bath.
Are you really alive right now?
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
