Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
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