new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
It's blow job season.
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
All I want is dick and wine.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
