he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize