i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
quadriplegic porn is always funny
no. no its not
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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