Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
She's popping painkillers like they're tic tacs and singing the soundtrack to dreamgirls. It's you're turn to babysit her.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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