I have found the one flaw to the great pride I took as a guy to not have to sit down to pee...having to sneeze while peeing.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Dude I just saw a beer truck w taps in the side... It's like god heard my prayers and sent me a gift from heaven
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
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