Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize
