they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
