Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
