Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
Mid thrust, say hold on I need a pic for my friend.
Randomize
